Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The Hormone Guide - A Man's Guide To Survival!

email of the week
sent to me by a woman.


The Hormone Guide 
Women will understand this!
Men should memorize it!


Every woman knows that there are days when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be carried like a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS

SAFER

SAFEST

ULTRA  SAFE

What's for
dinner?

Can I help you
with dinner?

Where would you like
to go for dinner?

Here, have some wine.

Are you
wearing that?

You sure
look good in brown!

WOW! Look at you!

Here, have some wine

What are you
so worked up about?

Could we be
overreacting?

Here's my paycheck.

Here, have some wine.

Should you be
eating that?

You know, there are
a lot of apples left.

Can I get you a piece
of chocolate with that?

Here, have some wine.

What did you
DO all day?

I hope you didn't
over-do it today.

I've always loved you
in that robe!

Here, have some wine.



13  Things PMS Stands For
  

1.  Pass My Shotgun

2.  Psychotic Mood Shift

3.  Perpetual Munching  Spree
 

4.  Puffy Mid-Section

5.  People Make me Sick

6.  Provide Me Sweets

7.  Pardon My Sobbing

8.  Pimples May Surface

9.  Pass My Sweatpants

10.  Pissy Mood Syndrome

11.  Plainly; Men Suck

12.  Pack My Stuff
 
and  my
 favorite one : 

13.  
Potential  Murder Suspect  

4 comments:

Deborah said...

Hey! I might just resemble that remark. Somewhat. Sometimes.

:)

middle child said...

I don't see any reason for men to open their mouths (well,...except one!) but if they must, regardless of the occasion or time of month, I do believe they should just stick to column 3. I mean like,...ALWAYS!

middle child said...

Men, if you must open your mouth, please choose your sentences from column 3 only.

linda said...

Haha, very funny. Lots of truth in there.

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